Disclaimer
The following is the author’s (probably not sober) opinion based entirely on their individual experience with the Brooks Ghost 2 men’s shoes. Sprinkle in bad grammar, comedy and potentially the use of mind-altering substances. Reader beware: Author’s momma says he’s special, on the spectrum, and rizzin’ em with the tism. Please take all reviews (especially ours) with a grain of salt, understanding the author’s state of mind at the time. Reader discretion advised. We are not experts, just laymen experiencing life with sarcasm, swear words, possibly hallucenogens, and unique perspectives.
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Heavy Rotation Review
Look, I’m not one to throw around accusations of corporate sabotage lightly, but after three months with the Brooks Ghost Max 2, I’m starting to wonder if these shoes weren’t designed by a shadowy cabal of emergency room physicians looking to drum up some business.
Before you dismiss me as just another internet crackpot with a keyboard and too much time on his hands, let me establish my credentials:
- I’m a 39-year-old dad who spends more time in gym shoes than dress shoes. We’re talking 2+ hours of workout time, four days a week, plus regular rucking sessions with weighted kit that would make a Marine Corps drill instructor nod approvingly.
- I’ve got neutral feet and a burning desire not to own more specialized footwear than my local Running Room.
- In other words, I’m exactly the kind of sucker these shoes were marketed to.
When I first saw the Ghost Max 2, with its chunky platform sole that screams “We can Hoka One One (that’s pronounced ” Hoke-ah onay onay,” for you peasants) too!”, I was intrigued. As a long-time Brooks devotee who’s worn through more pairs of regular Ghosts than I care to count, I thought this would be a match made in cushioned heaven.
Boy, was I wrong.
My first indication that something was amiss came during a night ruck when I attempted to clear a curb with all my kit on. Now, I’ve been stepping over curbs successfully since approximately age two, but something about the Ghost Max 2’s platform height turned this simple maneuver into what felt like a failed Olympic high jump attempt. Down I went, with all the grace of a tranquilized elephant, my weighted kit ensuring I hit the ground with roughly the force of a small meteorite. On the bright side, I got to test out my IFAK and medical skills, so… professional development?
Being the optimistic fool that I am, I chalked this up to user error and kept the shoes in rotation. That’s when I noticed something disturbing: these shoes have all the lateral stability of a drunk penguin on roller skates. Walking in them feels like someone duct-taped foam bricks to your feet – and not in a good way, if there is such a thing. Cross-training? Forget about it. I wouldn’t attempt a game of pickup basketball in these unless I had excellent health insurance and a high pain threshold.
But the real kicker (pun absolutely intended) came during what should have been a routine treadmill session. There I was, cruising at a modest 6 mph, when my Achilles started sending out distress signals like a sinking submarine. After some recovery time and a switch back to my trusty Ghost 16s (which performed flawlessly, I might add), I decided to give the Max one final chance. Six weeks later, same story: that familiar strain returned faster than a bad ex-girlfriend.
Here’s the bottom line: these shoes are so unstable, they make a Jenga tower in an earthquake look solid. They’re the kind of footwear you might give to your mother-in-law if you’re angling for that inheritance a bit early. In fact, I’m pretty sure these shoes were originally designed as part of a CIA interrogation program – “Walk a mile in these, and you’ll tell us everything.”
Want some specifics? The Ghost Max 2 manages to combine the worst aspects of maximalist cushioning with none of the benefits. The sidewalls feel like they were designed by someone who’s never actually seen a human foot in motion. It’s as if Brooks took everything that made their regular Ghost line great and said, “What if we did the opposite?”
Who are these shoes for? Well, if you’re looking to passive-aggressively sabotage your walking group, these might be perfect. They’re also great if you’ve ever wondered what it feels like to walk on stilts made of marshmallows. For literally everyone else, stick with the regular Brooks Ghost line – you know, the shoes that won’t try to kill you.
I wanted to love these shoes. I really did. The idea of getting the Hoka experience in a Brooks package seemed like a dream come true. Instead, it turned into a nightmare that my Achilles tendons won’t soon forget. These feel like they create the same sort of issues as the Skechers ShapeUps – at least to me. Save yourself the trouble (and potential medical bills) and stick with the original Ghost. Sometimes, more isn’t more – it’s just dangerous.
Rating: ★★☆☆☆ 2/5 Stars
And that’s only because they make excellent paperweights and good gifts for frenemies.
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